Off Balance
Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2011 6:39 pm
(Thanks to Roach, as always, and special thanks to Faige's and Lauren's players for reading through and giving feedback!)
Diya stood in front of her closet, evaluating her options. Jeans. Track pants. Yoga pants. Gym shorts. She knew she owned other stuff. Where was it?
She had a shopping trip planned for today. With Lauren. It was planned ages ago, so shopping was all it was for, right? Just get in, find an outfit for Homecoming, and get out.
Maybe if she repeated that to herself a few more times tonight, it would be true.
She needed something comfortable to wear, but didn’t want the same old stuff. But it still had to be easy to get off and on.
To make trying on clothes easier, Diya said to herself with a smirk.
She knelt down to paw through the clothes that had fallen - or been tossed - on the floor of the closet. She had an outfit in mind, it had to be here somewhere.
“Ah-ha!” she cheered, pulling out the leggings she’d been looking for. Blue animal print. That was trendy, right? She sniffed them gingerly and nodded. Still clean. Now where was the tunic that went with it? She’d last worn it to the movie marathon with Brodi - and Faige, though she hadn’t been part of Diya’s original plan.
Diya got down on her hands and knees to look under her bed - the place in the room she forbade Amy from trying to clean. There was the tunic! She pulled it out, victorious, happy to find it still clean, too. It wasn’t exactly an outfit that got a lot of airtime - Diya was just terrible about actually putting her clothes away properly on laundry day. The whole outfit was a little...softer than Diya liked to be, but it just felt right for tonight.
Diya glanced at her watch. Still awhile to go before she met up with Lauren. She couldn’t stay in her room; she’d go stir crazy. She couldn’t work out; the last thing she wanted was to be smelly and gross while out with Lauren, and there wasn’t time to work out and shower. Not if she didn’t want to be one of those girls who kept people waiting while she primped, anyway. “I wonder what Roach is up to,” Diya muttered as she headed out, remembering to grab her “Villains” jacket along the way.
***
Diya was pretty sure half the school was gathered at the stadium. Diya frowned to herself and hoped everyone attributed her expression to Roach’s ribbing or Lark’s presence. “I told you so, Behari” indeed.
So far only Lark and Abby had actually mentioned the outfit, but Diya was sure everyone else was taking mental note of it. She never should have put it on - at least not when she wasn’t able to sneak out without being seen. She had a normal look and it worked for her - why was she messing with it?
But before Diya could spend too much time glowering, Lauren showed up, and laughed along while Roach lectured her about Diya’s alleged curfew, and threatened Lauren with a shovel. A shovel? What happened to shotguns? When Roach started talking about finding a camera though, Diya suggested they run away. Fast. Lauren obliged, and the pair ran down the bleachers and out of the stadium before more ridiculous comments could follow.
“You’d think we were going out on a first date or something,” Lauren said as they left her school.
Diya just shook her head in amusement. It was an awful lot of fuss over a shopping trip.
***
At the clothing store, Diya made a big show of confusion and complaining, but she couldn’t stop grinning and laughing - even when Lauren brutally shot down Diya’s idea to wear a suit to the dance.
If anyone asked, she’d deny it to her grave, but Diya was actually having fun. Fun, in a mall, with a cheerleader. Who knew a year ago this was where she’d end up? Or nine months ago. Or even in May, when she had argued with Peyton and Lauren - pretty heatedly - over whether cheerleading was sport.
She wasn’t even nervous in the dressing room, with Lauren squeezed in with her. Diya had been sure this would be the worst part. What if nothing fit? What if everything made her thighs look even huger? But Lauren was good at this - everything fit fine, even if some of them were just ridiculously inappropriate for Homecoming. But it was nice to try on something different, even if just for a few seconds, and laugh with Lauren.
Diya even felt a little like a princess when Lauren gave her stamp of approval to the little black dress. She fought to keep back a smile, but failed, when Lauren even approved of the silly opera gloves she’d added to the dress - no questions asked.
Watching Lauren try on dresses was even more fun, though she had no idea why Lauren was trusting her taste. Diya’s lack of fashion sense was notorious. She just hoped the smoking hot dress Lauren settled on wouldn’t embarrass her at the dance. Of course, Lauren was one of those people who’d look hot in a paper sack, to paraphrase Diya’s mom.
***
After paying for their purchases - including a shiny new “official” Villains jacket for Lauren - the pair went to the food court rather than heading directly back to campus. Diya made a beeline for the sushi stand, ordering a California roll, a spicy tuna roll and a hot green tea. Lauren ordered the same.
As the rolls were being assembled, Diya stepped up to the cash register. As the cashier punched in her purchase, Diya bit the inside of her cheek, deliberating. After a moment’s hesitation, she turned to look at Lauren. “I got this, okay?”
“Oh, uh...okay,” Lauren said, then smiled.
Diya turned back to the cashier and told her she was buying both meals. With Lauren behind her, she could relax her facial expression a bit. That wasn’t hard, and seemed like the right thing to do! Paying for the meal was the least Diya could do after Lauren took her out shopping, after all. And all of...the other fun stuff they’d been doing together.
As she collected her change, Diya turned to Lauren. “You have to carry the trays, though!” Lauren grinned at her and Diya grinned right back, glad she’d come up with a way to keep this from feeling...serious.
Over sushi the girls chatted. Football and cheerleading, mostly. Diya grinned when Lauren promised she had a cheer worked out just for Diya for the next game. This was the best part about being a girl on the football team - if she’d been a guy player, out with a hot cheerleader, everyone would be assuming way more was actually happening here. But because they were both girls, they got to fly mostly under the radar, and then go off to one of their rooms or the other - totally unsuspiciously! - and have a whole other version of fun. Dating girls had its advantages.
Making out with girls, Diya corrected herself. Fooling around. Having fun.
“It’s just a cheer, you know,” Lauren said, bringing Diya’s attention back to the cheerleading discussion. “Bad poetry and all.”
Diya shrugged. “I don't have a terribly poetic name, so I'm gonna be impressed no matter what, I'm pretty sure.”
“Fair enough. And don't say ‘never.’ I'm definitely not perfect.” Lauren poked her sushi. “I screw up a lot.”
Diya shrugged. “Well, you haven't screwed up in front of me yet. Let me enjoy my delusions for a while longer, kay?”
“For awhile, huh?” Lauren smirked as Diya just sipped her tea. “You like having me around?”
Diya was glad to have the tea cup to obscure her face while she thought quickly. “I do.” She smirked, “You’re not bad, for a cheerleader.”
Lauren feigned offense. “For a cheerleader?”
“Well, you did come on a little strong when we first met.” Diya hadn’t exactly been planning on sharing sushi with a cheerleader back when she came to Westbrook, so it’d seemed like a good idea at the time to argue over the validity of cheerleading as a sport.
Lauren grinned sheepishly. “Yeah. Sorry about that. Forgive me?”
“Pretty sure I have. Wait,” Diya paused and pretended to think. “Yes. Definitely forgiven.” The girls laughed together. “Just trying to keep you on your toes!”
“People just love to do that it seems,” Lauren said before popping a piece of her sushi into her mouth. She was eating with her hands. Diya wondered just how hard it was to learn to use chopsticks when you couldn’t just mimic someone automatically. Would Lauren let her teach her?
“Oh?” Diya asked. “Is someone giving you trouble? Do I gotta go bust some heads?” She cracked her knuckles and tried to look menacing while her mind was racing to figure out who it could be. Was Wyatt bugging her again?
Lauren looked up from her sushi. “You’d do that for me?”
Diya’s bravado shrunk under Lauren’s gaze. She just smiled slightly and shrugged.
“Nobody’s messing with me. People just like to talk. And sometimes they come up with the strangest things to talk about.”
“Oh yeah?”
Lauren nodded and paused before asking “Did Brodi tell you Wyatt stopped by last night?”
Diya frowned a little and tugged on one of her pigtails. “He may have mentioned seeing him in your room. I was trying to think of a delicate way to ask about it, if it's even any of my business" Lauren poked at her sushi. “I mean, we were just having such a good time, I didn't want to be a downer if it was a sore subject."
“Sometimes? I just figure it's easier to come right out and say it.”
Diya tried to hide a rueful smile. She was pretty sure that’s exactly what Lauren said right before they kissed for the first time, when Diya had been uncharacteristically nervous about making a move on the cheerleader.
Lauren started to talk, her cadence a little off. “Wyatt came by to talk, and... he was really weird at first. Long story short... he wanted to get back together.”
Diya blinked once, but otherwise kept her expression and her voice neutral. “Oh.”
“And we're not... you and I... right? I mean, it's just for fun.”
“Absolutely!” Diya said, way too quickly. She knew it. That was the opposite of a subtle answer.
Lauren nodded. “I told him okay.”
Diya was still nodding along from her last answer, but stopped abruptly. She felt like she’d just belly flopped on the balance beam mid-cartwheel. Don’t let her see that. She tugged on a pigtail.
“I mean, there was a whole lot more to it than that,” Lauren added quickly. “But that’s the quick version.”
Diya nodded again, just once. “So...does that mean we're done? If you're back together, I mean.” She was pretty sure she knew the answer, but she needed to hear it from Lauren, just to be sure.
“Um... The stuff we've been doing alone? I mean aside from this...” Lauren was fumbling. “Yeah?” She winced slightly, but Diya hardly noticed.
“I understand,” she said in what she hoped was a normal-sounding voice. Her heart was beating too loudly in her ears to really hear herself well.
“I mean if it was just for fun... It's no big deal, right?”
Diya pulled on the ends of her gloves, fitting them tightly, then flexing her fingers, studying her hands closely for a moment. “"I mean, you guys were pretty serious,” That’s not what she was saying, Diya “I mean, yeah, just fun."
Lauren sighed a little. “Sorry?”
Diya looked up at Lauren and shrugged. “Nothing to be sorry about. We had a good time, and that's what's important, right?”
Lauren nodded vigorously. Diya thought she looked relieved. “Right! And we can still hang out, right? Like tonight. I had a blast”
Diya nodded, but she was pretty sure just hanging out wasn’t in the cards anymore. That’s not how she worked. Love ‘em and leave ‘em Behari - there was a reason she had that nickname back in the day.
“Oh! And I’m still cheering for you at the next game!”
Oh god, there was still a game this week to get through. Diya needed to leave. Now. She tugged on a pigtail again before nosily slurping the last of her tea. “Well, I need to get back to campus.” She stood abruptly and carried her tray - still half-filled with sushi - to the trash bin. Lauren followed suit, her tray still similarly full.
The ride back to school was quiet. Lauren made a few attempts at conversation, and so did Diya, but everything petered out quickly, leaving them sitting in silence again. Back at school, Diya waved goodnight to Lauren, saying she needed to check with Brook on some homework before calling it a night. As Lauren walked away, Diya pulled out her phone and hit a number on her speed dial. The phone on the end of the line rang and rang, before the voice mail finally picked up.
Diya hesitated for a few seconds, her throat suddenly feeling sore, before finally eeking out, “Brodi? I need you. Please.”
Diya stood in front of her closet, evaluating her options. Jeans. Track pants. Yoga pants. Gym shorts. She knew she owned other stuff. Where was it?
She had a shopping trip planned for today. With Lauren. It was planned ages ago, so shopping was all it was for, right? Just get in, find an outfit for Homecoming, and get out.
Maybe if she repeated that to herself a few more times tonight, it would be true.
She needed something comfortable to wear, but didn’t want the same old stuff. But it still had to be easy to get off and on.
To make trying on clothes easier, Diya said to herself with a smirk.
She knelt down to paw through the clothes that had fallen - or been tossed - on the floor of the closet. She had an outfit in mind, it had to be here somewhere.
“Ah-ha!” she cheered, pulling out the leggings she’d been looking for. Blue animal print. That was trendy, right? She sniffed them gingerly and nodded. Still clean. Now where was the tunic that went with it? She’d last worn it to the movie marathon with Brodi - and Faige, though she hadn’t been part of Diya’s original plan.
Diya got down on her hands and knees to look under her bed - the place in the room she forbade Amy from trying to clean. There was the tunic! She pulled it out, victorious, happy to find it still clean, too. It wasn’t exactly an outfit that got a lot of airtime - Diya was just terrible about actually putting her clothes away properly on laundry day. The whole outfit was a little...softer than Diya liked to be, but it just felt right for tonight.
Diya glanced at her watch. Still awhile to go before she met up with Lauren. She couldn’t stay in her room; she’d go stir crazy. She couldn’t work out; the last thing she wanted was to be smelly and gross while out with Lauren, and there wasn’t time to work out and shower. Not if she didn’t want to be one of those girls who kept people waiting while she primped, anyway. “I wonder what Roach is up to,” Diya muttered as she headed out, remembering to grab her “Villains” jacket along the way.
***
Diya was pretty sure half the school was gathered at the stadium. Diya frowned to herself and hoped everyone attributed her expression to Roach’s ribbing or Lark’s presence. “I told you so, Behari” indeed.
So far only Lark and Abby had actually mentioned the outfit, but Diya was sure everyone else was taking mental note of it. She never should have put it on - at least not when she wasn’t able to sneak out without being seen. She had a normal look and it worked for her - why was she messing with it?
But before Diya could spend too much time glowering, Lauren showed up, and laughed along while Roach lectured her about Diya’s alleged curfew, and threatened Lauren with a shovel. A shovel? What happened to shotguns? When Roach started talking about finding a camera though, Diya suggested they run away. Fast. Lauren obliged, and the pair ran down the bleachers and out of the stadium before more ridiculous comments could follow.
“You’d think we were going out on a first date or something,” Lauren said as they left her school.
Diya just shook her head in amusement. It was an awful lot of fuss over a shopping trip.
***
At the clothing store, Diya made a big show of confusion and complaining, but she couldn’t stop grinning and laughing - even when Lauren brutally shot down Diya’s idea to wear a suit to the dance.
If anyone asked, she’d deny it to her grave, but Diya was actually having fun. Fun, in a mall, with a cheerleader. Who knew a year ago this was where she’d end up? Or nine months ago. Or even in May, when she had argued with Peyton and Lauren - pretty heatedly - over whether cheerleading was sport.
She wasn’t even nervous in the dressing room, with Lauren squeezed in with her. Diya had been sure this would be the worst part. What if nothing fit? What if everything made her thighs look even huger? But Lauren was good at this - everything fit fine, even if some of them were just ridiculously inappropriate for Homecoming. But it was nice to try on something different, even if just for a few seconds, and laugh with Lauren.
Diya even felt a little like a princess when Lauren gave her stamp of approval to the little black dress. She fought to keep back a smile, but failed, when Lauren even approved of the silly opera gloves she’d added to the dress - no questions asked.
Watching Lauren try on dresses was even more fun, though she had no idea why Lauren was trusting her taste. Diya’s lack of fashion sense was notorious. She just hoped the smoking hot dress Lauren settled on wouldn’t embarrass her at the dance. Of course, Lauren was one of those people who’d look hot in a paper sack, to paraphrase Diya’s mom.
***
After paying for their purchases - including a shiny new “official” Villains jacket for Lauren - the pair went to the food court rather than heading directly back to campus. Diya made a beeline for the sushi stand, ordering a California roll, a spicy tuna roll and a hot green tea. Lauren ordered the same.
As the rolls were being assembled, Diya stepped up to the cash register. As the cashier punched in her purchase, Diya bit the inside of her cheek, deliberating. After a moment’s hesitation, she turned to look at Lauren. “I got this, okay?”
“Oh, uh...okay,” Lauren said, then smiled.
Diya turned back to the cashier and told her she was buying both meals. With Lauren behind her, she could relax her facial expression a bit. That wasn’t hard, and seemed like the right thing to do! Paying for the meal was the least Diya could do after Lauren took her out shopping, after all. And all of...the other fun stuff they’d been doing together.
As she collected her change, Diya turned to Lauren. “You have to carry the trays, though!” Lauren grinned at her and Diya grinned right back, glad she’d come up with a way to keep this from feeling...serious.
Over sushi the girls chatted. Football and cheerleading, mostly. Diya grinned when Lauren promised she had a cheer worked out just for Diya for the next game. This was the best part about being a girl on the football team - if she’d been a guy player, out with a hot cheerleader, everyone would be assuming way more was actually happening here. But because they were both girls, they got to fly mostly under the radar, and then go off to one of their rooms or the other - totally unsuspiciously! - and have a whole other version of fun. Dating girls had its advantages.
Making out with girls, Diya corrected herself. Fooling around. Having fun.
“It’s just a cheer, you know,” Lauren said, bringing Diya’s attention back to the cheerleading discussion. “Bad poetry and all.”
Diya shrugged. “I don't have a terribly poetic name, so I'm gonna be impressed no matter what, I'm pretty sure.”
“Fair enough. And don't say ‘never.’ I'm definitely not perfect.” Lauren poked her sushi. “I screw up a lot.”
Diya shrugged. “Well, you haven't screwed up in front of me yet. Let me enjoy my delusions for a while longer, kay?”
“For awhile, huh?” Lauren smirked as Diya just sipped her tea. “You like having me around?”
Diya was glad to have the tea cup to obscure her face while she thought quickly. “I do.” She smirked, “You’re not bad, for a cheerleader.”
Lauren feigned offense. “For a cheerleader?”
“Well, you did come on a little strong when we first met.” Diya hadn’t exactly been planning on sharing sushi with a cheerleader back when she came to Westbrook, so it’d seemed like a good idea at the time to argue over the validity of cheerleading as a sport.
Lauren grinned sheepishly. “Yeah. Sorry about that. Forgive me?”
“Pretty sure I have. Wait,” Diya paused and pretended to think. “Yes. Definitely forgiven.” The girls laughed together. “Just trying to keep you on your toes!”
“People just love to do that it seems,” Lauren said before popping a piece of her sushi into her mouth. She was eating with her hands. Diya wondered just how hard it was to learn to use chopsticks when you couldn’t just mimic someone automatically. Would Lauren let her teach her?
“Oh?” Diya asked. “Is someone giving you trouble? Do I gotta go bust some heads?” She cracked her knuckles and tried to look menacing while her mind was racing to figure out who it could be. Was Wyatt bugging her again?
Lauren looked up from her sushi. “You’d do that for me?”
Diya’s bravado shrunk under Lauren’s gaze. She just smiled slightly and shrugged.
“Nobody’s messing with me. People just like to talk. And sometimes they come up with the strangest things to talk about.”
“Oh yeah?”
Lauren nodded and paused before asking “Did Brodi tell you Wyatt stopped by last night?”
Diya frowned a little and tugged on one of her pigtails. “He may have mentioned seeing him in your room. I was trying to think of a delicate way to ask about it, if it's even any of my business" Lauren poked at her sushi. “I mean, we were just having such a good time, I didn't want to be a downer if it was a sore subject."
“Sometimes? I just figure it's easier to come right out and say it.”
Diya tried to hide a rueful smile. She was pretty sure that’s exactly what Lauren said right before they kissed for the first time, when Diya had been uncharacteristically nervous about making a move on the cheerleader.
Lauren started to talk, her cadence a little off. “Wyatt came by to talk, and... he was really weird at first. Long story short... he wanted to get back together.”
Diya blinked once, but otherwise kept her expression and her voice neutral. “Oh.”
“And we're not... you and I... right? I mean, it's just for fun.”
“Absolutely!” Diya said, way too quickly. She knew it. That was the opposite of a subtle answer.
Lauren nodded. “I told him okay.”
Diya was still nodding along from her last answer, but stopped abruptly. She felt like she’d just belly flopped on the balance beam mid-cartwheel. Don’t let her see that. She tugged on a pigtail.
“I mean, there was a whole lot more to it than that,” Lauren added quickly. “But that’s the quick version.”
Diya nodded again, just once. “So...does that mean we're done? If you're back together, I mean.” She was pretty sure she knew the answer, but she needed to hear it from Lauren, just to be sure.
“Um... The stuff we've been doing alone? I mean aside from this...” Lauren was fumbling. “Yeah?” She winced slightly, but Diya hardly noticed.
“I understand,” she said in what she hoped was a normal-sounding voice. Her heart was beating too loudly in her ears to really hear herself well.
“I mean if it was just for fun... It's no big deal, right?”
Diya pulled on the ends of her gloves, fitting them tightly, then flexing her fingers, studying her hands closely for a moment. “"I mean, you guys were pretty serious,” That’s not what she was saying, Diya “I mean, yeah, just fun."
Lauren sighed a little. “Sorry?”
Diya looked up at Lauren and shrugged. “Nothing to be sorry about. We had a good time, and that's what's important, right?”
Lauren nodded vigorously. Diya thought she looked relieved. “Right! And we can still hang out, right? Like tonight. I had a blast”
Diya nodded, but she was pretty sure just hanging out wasn’t in the cards anymore. That’s not how she worked. Love ‘em and leave ‘em Behari - there was a reason she had that nickname back in the day.
“Oh! And I’m still cheering for you at the next game!”
Oh god, there was still a game this week to get through. Diya needed to leave. Now. She tugged on a pigtail again before nosily slurping the last of her tea. “Well, I need to get back to campus.” She stood abruptly and carried her tray - still half-filled with sushi - to the trash bin. Lauren followed suit, her tray still similarly full.
The ride back to school was quiet. Lauren made a few attempts at conversation, and so did Diya, but everything petered out quickly, leaving them sitting in silence again. Back at school, Diya waved goodnight to Lauren, saying she needed to check with Brook on some homework before calling it a night. As Lauren walked away, Diya pulled out her phone and hit a number on her speed dial. The phone on the end of the line rang and rang, before the voice mail finally picked up.
Diya hesitated for a few seconds, her throat suddenly feeling sore, before finally eeking out, “Brodi? I need you. Please.”