A Word From Charlie

[Twitchcraft]

From: Charlie <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
To: Abigail <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
Date: Sun., Oct. 30, 2011 10:12 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

As I haven't heard back from you yet, I can only assume that you're still dazzled by my ability to cut the heart of any decision. That's okay, I get that a lot. To save you some scrolling, I'll recap:

Reasons My Little Sister Should Come Home

1. No snow down here. Guaranteed.

2. Roy's barbecue ribs, Glen's nuclear nachos, my killer chili.

3. Education. How much are you learning up there, Abigail? Not much, I think. Every time you turn around, it's another crisis. Maybe the schools down here don't deal with abilities like yours on a regular basis, but they're not likely to get bombed by psi-terrorists or flattened by meteors, either.

4. Finances. When you chose Westbrook (over my objections), you agreed to keep to a budget. You haven't kept your word, and I've stepped in twice now. (Send pictures of the homecoming dress. I paid for it, I should get to see it.) Your line of credit at the Bank of Charlie is stretched thin, Abby. I don't see reason enough to go throwing good money after bad at this point.

5. You tell us about lots of people, but you've yet to name any of them friends. I know you don't do that lightly, but you've been there nearly two months. By the way, you started out saying, "At Westbrook, we do this and we do that." Now it tends to be, "At Westbrook, they do this and they do that." Sounds like your bags are half-packed already.

--Charlie

PS: Call Roy and Diane occasionally, will you? They worry.

Charles A. Blackburn, Esq.
Garrity, Taylor, Hudgins & Beck, LLC
1024 Deer Run Trail
Houston, TX 77001

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From: Abigail <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
To: Jumbo Pain in My Backside <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
Date: Mon., Oct. 31, 2011 7:02 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

Did you know Roy is set on Matilda as a name for my niece? Try using your dazzling powers for good and talk him out of it!

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From: Charlie <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
To: Stubborn Little So-and-So <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
Date: Mon., Oct. 31, 2011 7:21 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

Yeah, I see what you did there. Please advise when I can expect honest answers to the points I raised.

Thanks,
Charlie

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From: Abigail <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
To: Jumbo Pain in My Backside <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
Date: Mon., Oct. 31, 2011 8:17 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

1. Shut it.
2. Shut it.
3. Shut it.
4. Shut it.
5. No, seriously, shut it.

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From: Charlie <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
To: Stubborn Little So-and-So <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
Date: Mon., Oct. 31, 2011 8:30 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

Eloquent.

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From: Abigail <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
To: Jumbo Pain in My Backside <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
Date: Mon., Oct. 31, 2011 8:36 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

Can we have one conversation where you don't cross-examine me? Just one?

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From: Charlie <charles.blackburn@gthblaw.org>
To: Stubborn Little So-and-So <abigail.blackburn@gmail.com>
Date: Mon., Oct. 31, 2011 10:03 a.m.

Re: When are you coming home?

Sure. Just tell me you're happy where you are. See? Simple.

--Charlie